Saturday, January 31, 2004

You are Michel Foucault! You wrote groundbreaking
histories of prisons, hospitals, asylums, and
sex. Interestingly, you thought basically the
same thing about all of them. Your historical
accuracy is a bit dodgy, but that was never
really the point. You were very obsessed with
power roles - so obsessed that you frequented
gay S&M clubs, and died of AIDS in 1984.

What 20th Century Theorist are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Again... some personality tests

Season = Autumn
You're Most Like The Season Autumn ...

You're warm, and the most approachable. You have
that gentle prescence about you. People can
relate to you, and find you easy company.
However it's likely you've been hurt in the
past and it has left you scarred so things can
become rather chilly with you at times. Being
the third Season in, you're mature, trustworthy
and loyal to your friends but prone to
depression and negative thinking.

Well done... You're the shy and sensitive season :)

?? Which Season Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla


?? Which Natural Wonder Or Disaster Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Nation States

I'm currently addicted in the game NationStates... jOMS, one of my best friends among the group of the Odders has posted the link to the game NationStates... What's the concept of the game, basically it's like ruling your own country... Look after the economics, politics and civil rights of your people... oh i surely wish that the contenders for the election take this game seriously so as to gain an idea on how they will run a nation

Friday, January 30, 2004

i just took sine personality tests again courtesy of quizilla, and here are the results... i took them coz i taught that I am in a need to know myself as deep as possible

and as a mythical creature i'm a
You're like a Vampire!

?? Which Mythical Creature Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

and as an either angel/demon i turned out to be


?? Which Angel Or Demon Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

and my god, i'm living the horror movie

You're living the movie Scream!

?? Which Horror Movie Are You Living ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Freaking Day/Reality TV

My mind is still reeling from the shock which I saw yesterday during my Leap session. I could not still get over the fact that I've witnessed through the video the grotesqueness and debauchery of the actual butchering and killing of the pigs and cows which i eat everyday... i could not help but get repelled by meat as of this moment. However, in the independent film making session yesterday, i saw a PLU oriented movie... It's entitled 'Kaibigan'... the story is quite simple... best of friends finally accepting the truth that they could not live with each other and finally making the 1st and huge step towards a loving relationship with each other. I think that really starting a relationship is one of the biggest risks that one has to take more so, a homosexual type of relationship... there's so much fear and paranoia of getting rejected and the fear of being discriminated by a narrow-minded network of friends, co-workers, the society, even your parents.. It's quite nice to see that the people here in our school has started on the path/route of finally accepting the truth.. and making homosexuality less than a taboo.


I'm quite a fan of Reality TV. my favorite shows include The Amazing RAce, Fear Factor and Survivor internationally while i'm an avid fan of Star In a Million locally... I often envision myself as being a competitor for this Reality Tv flicks... I do have a mediocre singing voice which means that i will just be scrapped off the competition before reaching even the finals... I do think however that I'm quite suited for the Amazing Race. am quite witty, willing to adapt and ever a linguist... I also think that I'm quite suited for Survivor... damn, this bloke is again daydreaming

Thursday, January 29, 2004

Indi-Un Film: LEAP

I thought that it would be again another boring day for me... today is LEAP in our school. in line for our University week celebration, one day is set aside for us to engage in some activities which would serve as an alternative for the classes for the whole day... i enrolled in a class called Independent unconventional Film making... turned out to be real nice but i was really disturbed by some of the concepts of the films... i'm kinda disturbed by some of the films esp. the last one... i may become a vegetarian... so gross and i wanna vomit...

Wednesday, January 28, 2004

What can i Say...

took another personality test in quizilla... trying to find what kind of soul i have... and the result is...

You are naturally born with a gift, whether it be
poetry, writing or song. You love beauty and
creativity, and usually are highly intelligent.
Others view you as mysterious and dreamy, yet
also bold since you hold firm in your beliefs.

What Type of Soul Do You Have ?
brought to you by Quizilla

also took another personality test regarding what kind of element i am... i found out that i am

Air. You think before you act, you look before you
leap. You are very direct, which sometimes can
hurt others. You are always looking for the
truth behind things. Of all the elements,
you're the wisest.

What is your element?
brought to you by Quizilla

funny thing... i really do belong to the element of air... Air is the strongest and most dominant element in me as attested by my fellow wiccan practitioner ... ok

Tuesday, January 27, 2004

Warning/ Capoeira and Song Review: Powerless

i can't help but feel sad that some idiotic and pompous asses are targetting me over pinoyexchange... damn those blokes, i could not help but feel sad and feel vengeful at times... but, as i've learned in the art of war, you must right for the proper timing, and place the proper blow to kill your enemy... one must parry before one could thrust, one must dance around and skirt in the edges before dealing the devastating, final blow, the coup de grace... don't they dare fuck with me coz i could go all raving and stark mad...

i watched kill bill again and i've noticed that uma aka the bride did capoeira... and it really caught my attention... for such a long time, capoeira has been on my mind... It's like an exercise/play which originated from the South American country of Brazil. it's called pogo by the Portuguese... for those who really don't know what I'm talking about... try associating with the characters of eddy gordo and christie monteiro of the tekken series and you'lll get the picture of what i'm really saying. damn, i would love to master the art of capoeira. problem is, i'm quite a dunderhead and a sissy... add in the fact that i've grown fat but, still i would love to learn capoeira...

Song review: hmmm...for today's song, i would like to comment on the new song of Nelly Furtado.. Nelly really woahed me with her 1st album Whoa Nelly which dished out the hits I'm LIke a Bird, Hey man and turn off the light. she also did a re-mix of Missy Eliott's Get ur Freak ON. and now she's back with this funky and quite quirky song... Powerless talks about being in a section of a society which is most often misunderstood by most of the others... it's like the counterculture/subculture vs. the society and it's standards.. with the funky beats and the hand clapping, this song really impressed me. without further adieu, here's the song...

Powerless by Nelly Furtado

Paint my face in your magazines
Make it look whiter than it seems
Paint me over with your dreams
Shove away my ethnicity
Burn every notion that I may have a flame inside to fight
And say just what is on my mind
Without offending your might

Cause this life is too short to live it just for you
But when you feel so powerless what are you gonna do
So say what you want
Say what you want

I saw her face outside today
Weatherworn, looking all the rage
They took her passion and her gaze and made a poster
Now it’s moccasins we sport
We take the culture and contort
Perhaps only to distort what we are hiding

Cause this life is too short to live it just for you
But when you feel so powerless what are you gonna do
But say what you want
Say what you want

Hey you, the one outside, are you ever gonna get in, get in
Hey you, the one that don’t fit in, how ya, how ya gonna get in
Hey you, the one outside, are you ever gonna get in with your
Broken teeth, broken jaw, broken mojo
Yeah, this life is too short to live it just for you
But when you feel so powerless, what are you gonna do

Cause this life is too short to live it just for you
But when you feel so powerless, what are you gonna do

Playing Hooky...

today, i'm not gonna attend my Philosophy of History class... screw that bloke... i ain't gonna see him this week... i have unlimited cuts and his classes are a bore... so might as well skip it... so here i am..

also signed up with quizilla and i've managed to find a quiz regarding who i am in the pantheon of the greek gods and goddesses...being the mythology buff that i am, i took the test and i found out that i am...


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

woah... I am Nemesis... come to think of it... her personality really synchronizes with mine.

also took another test regarding how "dark" i am.... i really really feel that i'm turning into a meaner and crankier person... i don't know what's happening to me... here are the results btw.

Dark magician. You love the dark because of it's
beauty and just the life that no-one else sees.
Mysterious, calm, quiet... But that doesn't
mean you're not friendly!

What kind of dark person are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Monday, January 26, 2004

Rants, Song review

I couldn't help but get pissed over that freaking code4thyear... damn that bloke... he's trying to ruin the camaraderie which is being built by the group where i belong... pathetic... i wish i have a hattori hanzo for me to finally chop off his head.... decapitate him...

Song Review:

my song for today is Ikaw Lamang. Ikaw Lamang is originally done by Janno GIbbs and Jaya... it's like a song which shows affirmation of love.... and it really is full of love... i think i'm in love again.. it has been done by gayle dizon, which is like one of my most favorite singers, and my man sang it to me yesterday with raw emotions... damn, i could feel his love...

Ikaw Lamang

ikaw ang pangakong taglay ng isang bituin
tanging pangrap sa diyos ay hiling
makapilingsa bawat sandali

ikaw ang pag-ibig sa araw at gabi
ikaw ang pag-asang tanglaw sa dilim
napapawing hirap at pighati

langit ang buhay kapag ika'y hahagkan
anong ligaya kapag ika'y mamasdan
sa piling mo ang gabi tila araw ikaw ang pangarap
ikaw lamang

ikaw ang pag-ibig sa araw at gabi
ikaw ang pagasang tanglaw sa dilim
napapawing hirap at pighati

langit ang buhay kapag ika'y hahagkan
anong ligaya kapag ika'y mamasdan
sa piling mo ang gabi tila araw ikaw ang pangarap
ikaw lamang

langit ang buhay kapag ika'y hahagkan
anong ligaya kapag ika'y mamasdan
sa piling mo ang gabi tila araw ikaw ang pangarap
ikaw lamang

FUCK !!!!!!!!!!!!

napaka-expressive ng title ng post... shows the frustration that has been building inside me since yesterday's fucking night.

saturday night: watched kill bill uli... mag-isa lang ako ngAYOn... di ko kasama c Shella, di ko rin kasama c Marlon... and nakakaletse ung mga nanunuod sa rob place... parang ang syonga syonga nila... nang makita lang ung bloodspray.. sisigaw na agad... as if naman may magagawa ung pagsigaw nila... their screams could not save oren from getting slashed by the bride... i hate it when people are so ignorant about the film... ang syonga syonga... i can't help but retort to their screams and shout "Will you give me a break"... muntik pang mapa-away pero screw them... i have every right naman din to enjoy the movie... screw them... screw them... after watching Kill bill, i labored on doing my cultural history paper... it's so nice to see naman pala na ang Filipino culture is a combination of the Orient and the Occident... ang daming insights kong natutunan on how the filipinos think... pero dito nag-umpisa ung kalbaryo ko... nakalimutan kong i-save ung paper ko sa floppy... sa computer ko lang siya isinave... and then the road to calvary started..

Sunday: forgot to open my pc coz i have such a busy day... go to rob place to buy a new pair of underwears... brought some black underwear again and then proceeded to the arcades section to meet my marlon... we had such a great time playing capcom vs. snk where i think he got the better of me... he managed to defeat me 10-9 games... damn, that means i;ve got to start playing again... my Cammy-Mai-King is being smothered by those Shotokans... good thing i've switched to Morrigan-King-Cammy... that evened up the matched... after about 3 hours of playing, we decided to go singing in the videoke room... He sang Ikaw Lamang while I sang Overjoyed.... the song is so sweet... and i could not restrain myself from hugging him and saying i love him...and then we're off again to the movies... this time, we've watched ROTK for about the nth time and we let ourselves be deluded and amazed by Legolas... damn that elf...

but i guess good things could not last... when i was printing my work, my computer suddenly shut down... and it fucking refused to open up again... i was infected by a virus again... good thing my marlon is such a computer geek, hehehe, and fixed it up but it took him about 5 hours to finally fix the problem... and all the files which was saved the entire week was lost... that included my culthis paper.... typed it manually... and fuck, my finger lost it's sensation already... but the only redeeming thing is that my beau was beside me... and i sincerely love his eyes which melt me... and his ever luscious lips w/c has memorized my body...

oh shucks...

monday is such a drag... and i hate my professor tomorrow... i hate the philohi prof... i want to give him a finger one of this days...

Friday, January 23, 2004

ang lakas ng tama sa akin ng Kill Bill, and i'm on a Japanese roll.... way of culture and thinking... as usual, this tests could be found in the jaguarlord's blog.

Compassion: You are there to share your sympathy
with others. People would consider you
affectionate and caring, and someone to look up

Which Characteristic From the Samurai Code Matches You Best? (You may find out your best trait)
brought to you by Quizilla

seen this link from the jaguarlord's blog... (may crush kasi ako kay zeki e...) and here is the fucking result

You are 30% geek
You are a geek liaison, which means you go both ways. You can hang out with normal people or you can hang out with geeks which means you often have geeks as friends and/or have a job where you have to mediate between geeks and normal people. This is an important role and one of which you should be proud. In fact, you can make a good deal of money as a translator.

Normal: Tell our geek we need him to work this weekend.

You [to Geek]: We need more than that, Scotty. You'll have to stay until you can squeeze more outta them engines!

Geek [to You]: I'm givin' her all she's got, Captain, but we need more dilithium crystals!

You [to Normal]: He wants to know if he gets overtime.

Take the Polygeek Quiz at

Thursday, January 22, 2004

slow internet connection, medical check-up, and foolish

i can't figure out why the freaking internet connection that i'm using is so goddamn bagal... parang aabutin na ako ng ilang years para lang makapasok sa yahoo site ko... yahoo-dependent pa naman ako... damn...

anyways, i feel like i'm coming down with something... i feel like i'm burning up inside... my hands are clammy yet i'm freaking sweating... damnit.. tapos kanina pa sa break ko, nakatulog ako sa library for 3 straight hours... ang sarap matulog kaso ang thingie lang ay ang sakit ng batok ko....

today, i took my physical examination...and the doctor tasked to do my physical is such a hottie.... cute niya... and the most embarrassing thing happened.... nagkaroon ako ng hard-on.... coz we were talking about sexual activities and he asked me to strip down and get rid of my briefs and pants para malaman if i've got luslos.... and my freaking "putotoy" just kept on growing... damn... kakahiya talaga... tapos, after the ordeal, nakangisi ng isang knowing smile ang medical examiner... speaking of nakakahiya...

SOng Review: I feel like that i should present you one of the songs that made it big in 2002... it's by Ashanti. FOolish... pinakinggan ko uli ung Ashanti cd ko kaninang umaga and naenthrall na naman ako sa song... it's all about being caught up in a situation where you're tired and sick of being caught into one, yet you still choose to be in that particular situation... as usual.. marlon-related song na naman...

Foolish by Ashanti

See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you

Baby I don't know why ya treatin me so bad
You said you love me, no one above me
And I was all you had
And though my heart is eating for ya
I can't stop crying
I don't know how
I allow you to treat me this way and still i stay

See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you

Baby I don't know why ya wanna do me wrong
See when I'm home, I'm all alone
And you are always gone
And boy, you know I really love you
I can't deny
I can't see how you could bring me to so many tears
after all these years

See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
I trusted you, I trusted you
So sad, so sad
what love will make you do
all the things that we accept
be the things that we regret
too all of my ladies (ladies) feel me
c'mon sing wit me
See, when I get the strength to leave
You always tell me that you need me
And I'm weak cause I believe you
And I'm mad because I love you
So I stop and think that maybe
You can learn to appreciate me
Then it all remains the same that
You ain't never gonna change
(never gonna change, never gonna change)
See my days are cold without you
But I'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you
See my days are cold without you
But i'm hurtin while im with you
And though my heart can't take no more
I keep on running back to you

Baby why you hurt me leave me and desert me
Boy I gave you all my heart
And all you do is tear it up
Looking out my window
Knowing that I should go
Even when I pack my bags
There's something always holding me back

hmmmm... i've got to do pa pala my Cultural History paper tomorrow... and kailangan ko nang tapusin itong love in the time of cholera.... pero later na lang.

freaking day... ang haba ng break ko... mula 12 hanggang 4... apat na oras... di ko alam kung ano ang gagawin ko sa haba ng excess time ko...

i so love this song... finally got the lyrics of Tila..

Lani Misalucha
Loving You [2003]

Tila inulan ang puso ko,
Nang nanlamig ang 'yong pagsuyo
O, bakit nagbago ang yong pagtingin
Parang malamig na panahon

At nang ikaw ay kinausap ko
Habang ang ulan ay bumubuhos
Nakita ko sa 'yong mga mata
Na gaganda ang panahon

Tila hihina rin ang ulan
Tila lilipas din ang bagyo
Kahit madilim ang kalawakan
May nagtatagong sinag sa ulap

Tila inulan ang puso ko
Na parang naglaho ang pag-ibig mo
O, bakit ka kaya nagbago
Sinlamig ng panahon

Tila hihina rin ang ulan
Tila lilipas din ang bagyo
Liliwanag din ang kalangitan
At ang araw ay sisikat nang muli

Ang karimlan ay haharapin
Matatanaw ko rin bughaw na langit
Umaasang pag-ibig mo ay magbabalik

Hawiin mo ang lungkot sa puso ko
Kahit madilim ang kalawakan
May nagtatagong sinag sa ulap

Tila hihina rin ang ulan
Tila lilipas din ang bagyo
Liliwanag din ang kalangitan
At ang araw ay sisikat nang muli


seen this link in Jagard's blog... hehehe.. and i've tried it... so here are the results of the freaking test...

and i'm a....

You are Form 1, Goddess: The Creator.

"And The Goddess planted the acorn of life.
She cried a single tear and shed a single drop
of blood upon the earth where she buried it.
From her blood and tear, the acorn grew into
the world."

Some examples of the Goddess Form are Gaia (Greek),
Jehova (Christian), and Brahma (Indian).
The Goddess is associated with the concept of
creation, the number 1, and the element of
Her sign is the dawn sun.

As a member of Form 1, you are a charismatic
individual and people are drawn to you.
Although sometimes you may seem emotionally
distant, you are deeply in tune with other
people's feelings and have tremendous empathy.
Sometimes you have a tendency to neglect your
own self. Goddesses are the best friends to
have because they're always willing to help.

Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

whoa... freaking goddess...

Wednesday, January 21, 2004

Blood... "tila".... Going out with beau....

as i was typing kanina before this stupid individual pushed the power button in this terminal...

the 21st of January is such an event-filled day for this young baliw... sobrang daming nangyari sa araw na ito na halos di ko pa macomprehend ang lahat ng nangyari sa akin...

the 21st of January began for me when i was awakened from a sleepless slumber by the buzzing of my alarm clock at around 6:55.... hmmm... weird... di ko naman na set ung alarm clock ko ng 6:55, sinet ko siya ng 7:30.... weird talaga... so i just continued on my routine tapos nakinig ng Morning Zoo crew sa MAgic... this crew really really rock... kulit kasi ni Tetta at ni Logan... and i really, really like their frank and incessant flirtations with being cut off from the airwaves. They really really exude an attitude which i really really like, Fuck off attitude and Screw the rules type of thinking....which is somewhat similar to my own ideals...

i knew that this will be an event-filled day when i received a call from my beau(as of the freaking moment) around 8 while i was in the showers... I've got to go traipsing all over to the sala (w/c is nearer) in the nude just to answer the phone.. damn this bloke really really wants me to be his lover... niyaya ba naman akong lumabas ngayon and nood ng kill bill with my friend... so pumayag ako.... and at the course of the moment, while waiting for the start of the movie, we had a conversation regarding the whole henry-marlon relationship... finally, i agreed na lang to continue my relationship with him, sabi kasi ng best friend ko na si Shella, i have to take the risks if i'm really in love with that person... so here i am, just took the risk... and i think that taking this risk will be worth it... besides, How could i live life fully if i continue not taking the risks to be burned... or parang masakit ata iyon.. bsta come what may ang sigaw naming dalawa...nahalata ata kami kanina ng katabi namin kasi holding hands pa kami..

KILL BILL volume 1: this fucking movie really is a serious contender for being my favorite film. Full of blood, gore and violence, pero philosophical and ethical/moral (?) pa rin ang dating.... love most of the scenes... esp. ung anime part, ung showdown ni Vernita Green, ung laban ni GOGO (favorite ko ung weapon niya..) and ung laban nina O Ren Shii at ng Bride.... sobrang kakaelibs si Uma... and i like her shoes... hahahaha... I could imagine myself having a katana ready to pierce through the heart of my fucking enemies.. can't wait for the volume 2

Tila: sobrang elibs itong kanta na ito para sa akin.. I first heard the song last year pa when it was sung by teresa duon sa SIAM... the lyrics really touches me... ngayon ko lang nalaman na c lani misalucha pala ung original... it shows that there is hope despite being caught in a deadlock in a particular situation... parang ako..

Tuesday, January 20, 2004

shit.... nawala ung lahat ng tinype ko.... type type ulit....

finally, gumawa na ako ng blog kasi naiinis na sa akin ung bestfriend ko regarding duon sa incessant emails na ipinadadala ko sa kanya na puro puno ng angsts at kabaliwan....

I feel like i'm being sucked into an emotional rollercoaster and i really don't want this feeling that I'm experiencing.... god knows kung paano ako nashonga to the max nung high school over oliver... grabe, ayoko na uling maulit ito...Nag-send ako kanina ng pm kay Joms pero di naman sumagot, pero ok lang... this decision should rest on me...

Ano ang susundin, ulo o ang puso?

Ito ang tanong na napakahirap sagutin... Kapag pinairal ang puso, makikipagbalikan ako sa kanya... pag pinairal ang utak, kakalimutan ko na siya... pero parang mas matimbang pa rin ang puso.. MArami na kasi kaming pinagsamahan nung gago na iyon e... Ako ang nagturo sa kanya ng pamumuhay ng isang PLU... at masarap siyang magmahal... Ngayon ko lang naranasan sa buong buhay ko ang atensyon na ibinigay sa akin ng beau ko... ngayon ko lang naranasan na ipagtanggol ako sa tatay ko, sa mga kaibigan ko at sa mga kaaway ko... and i could not forget how his kisses always seem to linger in my body....

pero ayoko naman pong mashonga sa pag-ibig.. kaya pinapakawalan ko siya... ngunit, ang epekto naman ay isang pantasya at pagliliwaliw ng utak... windang at gulo pa rin ako...

MUSIC: I finally got a copy of the Star in A Million Album and i was really astounded by what i've heard... such a nice nice compilation... for those who don't know, SIAM is like an American idol singing contest... I was really impressed by the talents of these people... frustrated songer kasi dahil puro saliwa ung low notes at high notes.... Damn... kakaantig ung version ni Gayle ng I Can't Tell You Why... sobrang kakaelibs....

Personality: Someone's in a cranky mood today and that someone is me... ang mean ko sa mga tao... naalala ko pa ung reaction nung mcdo crew kanina nung sinigawan ko siya.... I feel like something in my body is off..

Movies: Gonna watch Kill Bill again tomorrow... galing talaga ni Cottonmouth

damn... finally i'm gonna start my blog (1 - 100)

  • 01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004
  • 02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004
  • 03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004
  • 04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004
  • 05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004
  • 06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004
  • 07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
  • 08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004
  • 09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004
  • 10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
  • 11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004
  • 12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005
  • 01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
  • 02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005
  • 03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005
  • 04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005
  • 05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005
  • 06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005
  • 07/01/2005 - 08/01/2005
  • 09/01/2005 - 10/01/2005
  • 10/01/2005 - 11/01/2005
  • 07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006
  • 08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006
  • 09/01/2006 - 10/01/2006